Heart and Soul (Mates)

SEMINYAK ~ Soulmates are those very special people that mirror us so clearly that it can make both parties want to run a mile. Find out how to meet your soulmate, overcome your fears and create a loving relationship with them, here.

Case Study

Diana came to me for help with her soulmate relationship.

“He’s in Germany. He’s much older than me, married, unsuitable and I can’t see how we can be together,” she said, dolefully. I asked, would she move to Germany so she could at least see him and discover how they each felt. “No!” She exclaimed. It’s far too expensive for me to live there. She went on: “What do you do when you love someone who is married yet know that they are the one? How do you know what’s for the best?”

“Follow your heart,” I replied. “It’s the best guide of what is right for you. If you feel you want to go there, then go. And let things unfold as they will.”

“But what about his wife and his family? I feel guilty about them. What if he rejects me?”

It transpired that she was not willing to do what needed to be done, to make her dreams happen, instead, staying stuck and wishing that things would change, yet not doing anything about it. We did the following visualization to free up fears and blocks, and changed some beliefs, below, which you can try too:

Willingness Meditation

Relax, breathe and find yourself standing on a most beautiful beach. The sand is white and glittery, and the sea is the most amazing blue – almost purple, and sparkling with light. At the shore, you pick up a pale lilac shell and find it has a label attached, which reads “I am waiting for you.” You put it to your ear, and ask, mentally, “Where?” and follow your feet. Soon, you see footprints in the sand, and follow them, until you find another pair of feet. You look up, into the face of your beloved. Just look into their face and feel your feelings. Enjoy the moment. Allow any obstacles to melt away. You may find there are none. Just enjoy loving your soulmate. Take their hand. And when ready, gently return to the room, bringing them back with you.

What did you discover? Was it easy to find your soulmate? Did their identity surprise you? Are there really any obstacles, at all?

To paraphrase a book I once read: “soulmates mirror us so clearly that we see the cellulite of our very soul blown up in giant Technicolor!” No wonder the whole thing is a bit scary. We look in the mirror, go “argh! Is that me?!” and run away, terrified. After the initial powerful rush of love comes the baggage – all the insecurities, fears and doubts that we have in our inner wardrobes – all being exposed so that they can be healed, overcome and resolved. It can be quite a rollercoaster ride. Yet the powerful love is what keeps us running back to each other – so that, ultimately, all is healed. Once that’s achieved, we are able to be with our soulmate without the “argh!” feeling. Remember, they are only showing you yourself. Which of course, is the greatest gift.

Belief Change

To free yourself from some beliefs that can limit soulmate relationships, use this process. Simply say the following aloud (the belief is in italics). Repeat the process on the other beliefs listed below.

I choose to believe “I’m afraid of my soulmate”

I love myself when I believe “I’m afraid of my soulmate”

And I embrace it, and I surrender.

Rest afterwards, drink water.

Our Soulmate Is Who We Are

When we are afraid of our soulmate, we are really afraid of ourselves. Afraid of our own beauty and power, afraid of hurting ourselves, of not giving ourselves what we want. And more than this – we are afraid of the whole world, in a sense. This is because our connection with our soulmate also represents our ability to connect with the world, in a universal sense. The yin and yang connection. You may find, when you overcome the soulmate fear, that you suddenly feel a much greater connection with everything in your life, and a much greater ability to interact with the world, and greater confidence that you can create what you want. Let me know how you get on.

Other Related Beliefs

I’m not willing to do what I need to, to create my happiness

I’m not sure that I’m really real

I’m not sure what I really feel

I’m not sure whether I’m really right

I’m not sure that it is safe to be happy and well and with my soulmate

I’m not sure that I am meant to be together, suitable for myself

I’m not sure that I don’t need to pay to be with, or see, my soulmate

I can’t conceive of being with my soulmate easily

I’m afraid of my mother

Living Freely

Did you do the exercise last week, in which I suggested you reflect on all areas of life where you end up “paying for things” – either emotionally, with your energy, or with cash? I hope by now you are realizing any areas of “expense” and eliminating them. You don’t need to pay for your happiness.


Diana looked far brighter and happier when I saw her a week after our healing session. She was making plans to go to Germany and felt a great deal more confident that she could give her dreams a chance. “I’m planning a wonderful reunion!” she enthused, with a huge smile.

When you stop being afraid of your soulmate, they will stop being afraid of you.

Next issue: Discovering Inner Harmony

Jelila is magical healing singer and intuitive guide, practicing in Asia and Australia. Now offering individual transformation sessions in Seminyak, Bali, at Health & Beauty Spa, Jl. Dyana Pura 6B (near Zula).   Tel:  +62 (0) 81 239 43354.

If you have a question you would like answered in this column, please write to Jelila at jelila@jelila.com.

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