Finessing Your Creations

By Jelila

The Bali Times

SEMINYAK ~ It’s not what you do; it’s the way that you do it. That’s what brings results – and also, importantly, meaning and enjoyment. Find out how to finesse your creations with feeling, so that they bring you true satisfaction, here.

Case Study

Susan came to me feeling frustrated in using language. Finding it hard to learn Indonesian with a teacher, she needed to communicate easily with her staff and was frustrated at the pace of her learning. We reflected on the urge that she felt to change – was it the gentle growing of a plant spreading new leaves, or was it hard work, uncomfortable and awkward? Susan felt that she needed to push herself in order to grow – setting challenges and announcing them so that she would feel peer pressure to achieve her goals. Yet was that really necessary or fun? No one stands over a plant with a whip to make it grow.

Susan also felt that her ideas about change were out of date – in fact, she saw change as largely positive; however, she still had old ideas of difficulty attached in her mind.

We explored Susan’s feelings about communicating. “I always feel confused by words. They cannot express my feelings,” she said. I explained that words are convenient labels that we use for expediency so that we may communicate, but they do not explain our existence. Nor can they – our existence simply is a pure vibration, a frequency, a feeling. It just is. We can describe it in a rudimentary form in words but the words would never allow us to replicate that experience.  However, words are, of course, helpful in enabling us to achieve things and also possess a beauty of their own.

We do communicate directly through feeling – by simply feeling. In other words, we send out our own feelings as a vibration, and sense feelings from others the same way, all the time. This in itself is a major form of communication, though largely unacknowledged. We also communicate our desires through feeling, again through our personal vibration, and the universe responds with events to reflect that. In fact every cell is singing a hymn of who we are.

The result of this long and fascinating exploration with Susan was that on a deep level, it transpired she believed that everything would be perfect, if only she could find the right words. Susan is remarkably eloquent in thought and feeling – this was just an erroneous belief that was limiting her from feeling satisfied in expressing herself, and also from experiencing her perfection!

It may surprise you to know that teeny-tiny ideas and beliefs, sometimes just a few words long, can affect your entire existence. Imagine that you and I are together in a room. The room is a lift or elevator, and suddenly we go down all the way to the bottom of the ocean. Fish, dolphins and octopi are swimming outside. Far above, floating on the surface, are all the situations and stories in your life at the moment. Down here on the seabed, we may change a few tiny things and they immediately change all the situations above, rather like pulling on the strings of a puppet. Changing even one subconscious negative belief creates major positive transformation up on the surface.

The belief is: I believe perfect = the right words, having the right words.

Change it using the process below. You may be amazed at how you feel when you do it. What this belief does is free you from the need to justify or explain yourself in words. It frees the feeling, feminine, intuitive part of you from needing to justify itself and will assist you to just be. It may stop your mind chatter (or the need for it). It is quite extraordinary. All you need do is to read the words aloud.

Belief Change

Feel that your feet are connected to the ground. Get in touch with the active, work-related part of you and invite it to be present. Invite in the feeling, intuitive part of you. Invite the playful one, and the wise one and any other parts of yourself to be present. Now say aloud:

I choose to believe “perfect = the right words, having the right words”

I love myself when I believe “perfect = the right words, having the right words”

And I embrace it, and I surrender

Rest afterwards, drink water.

Other Beliefs:

I’m trying to do something that isn’t possible, that just isn’t possible

Everything is not quite perfect

Change is uncomfortable and awkward

I’m not fully committed

I’m not sure that I am really best, for the best

Susan and I also spoke about the way in which to achieve things and prioritizing time. She mentioned her Indonesian class using up her time. “What would you rather be doing?” I asked. This floored her. What would you rather be doing, in your life?


Relax, breathe and find yourself standing by a beautiful cliff-top path. A bicycle is discarded beside you, wheel spinning. Below you see a boat, with someone calling you. You cannot quite hear their words through their cupped hands. A light-filled figure appears beside you, cherishing a glowing light in their hands which they give to you. You hold the light up and use it to read the instructions on a piece of paper you find in your pocket. Now you are completely free to explore and enjoy the journey for as long as you wish. When ready, breathe and gently return.

Postscript: Susan was concerned about her speed of progress. “Is the quickest way best?” I asked. “What if the long route is a beautiful cliff-top journey overlooking the sea, and the shortcut is through thorn bushes?” We considered other options for language learning – could for example, Susan’s staff help her with her Indonesian at work? This kind of solution has finesse, which is qualitative rather than quantitative – creating a win-win where Susan’s staff coach her, she learns and they all have fun. Akin to taking a bicycle to ride the beautiful cliff-top journey or using a trampoline to jump the thorn bushes.

Next issue: Magnets.

Jelila is a magical healing singer and intuitive guide, practicing in Asia and Australia. Now offering individual transformation sessions in Seminyak, Bali, at Health & Beauty Spa, Jl. Dyana Pura 6B (near Zula). Tel:  +62 (0) 81 239 43354. Website:

If you have a problem or query you would like be helped with in this column, please write to Jelila at

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