Why We Love Men

By Paulo Coelho
For The Bali Times

– Second in a three-part series –

Since last week’s column was published, based on a survey I made on the reason why women love us, I have received an enormous amount of comments (in favor of and against the text). So I have decided to use another two columns to hear what other women have to say on the subject. One reader, Kristen, claims that we know absolutely nothing about feminine nature, and sends us the following list:

1 – We women are born detectives. In our eyes, all men are suspect and their adventures will end up being discovered – it’s just a matter of time.

2 – Even if we are not in love with you, hearing “I love you” is a balm to our souls. And if you don’t say it, we will notice and become sad.

3 – The same thing happens with “you are beautiful.” It takes less than two seconds to say these three magical words, which can change our nightmares into real fairy tales.

4 – If we ask what clothes we should wear, don’t be annoyed if we put on exactly the opposite of what you chose – that’s part of our nature.

5 – At a party we are capable of scanning the whole room in less than a minute to find out what interests us. Just watch.

6 – We think of sex with the same compulsion as men – or maybe even more so. The only difference is that we don’t show it.

7 – If we don’t accept immediately an invitation to dinner or a first date, don’t worry – we just need a few days to lose the extra kilos that we always feel are ruining our lives.

8 – Women always remember everything. If you ask when we met, none of us will say: “at a party.” We will say: “It was a Tuesday, right after a dinner where they served salad and chicken broth, and you were wearing a black blazer and designer shoes, and so on.

9 – However much love we are capable of giving, there are seven days when we want to be far from everything and everybody. You have two options: tie yourself to a lamp-post and wait till the storm is over, or else go the nearest jeweler’s and buy a present. We recommend the second option.

10 – We have as much power of reasoning as men do. But we don’t need to make this evident; otherwise you will feel insecure. Women who do that end up alone.

11 – We love all kinds of hair on the male body, although waxing is our favorite torture.

12 – We hate making love when we don’t feel like it, but we do it anyway, and you will never be able to notice the difference.

13 – Play with our pets and our children, and we will play with you. Ignore them, and we will ignore you too.

14 – Women are equipped with X-ray vision. We can look at hard, dark eyes and discover the child hiding behind them. We can stare at angel-blue eyes and discover the demon that lies there. We know when men are pretending to be sleeping from tiredness or – more obviously – when they are pretending not to be sleeping with someone else.

15 – Not all women want marriage and children. Many just want orgasms and pets.

16 – If we have some problem to discuss with you, don’t try to give us the solution; we already have one. It’s just a pretext to prevent the relationship ending in boredom.

I shall end next week with a text written by Julia, and her (supposedly imaginary) reasons why men love women.

© Translated by James Mulholland


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