Letting Go, and Living
By Lydia Wilson
For the Bali times
KEROBOKAN ~ We often hear the term “psychosomatic illness”; it’s an infirmity caused by the mind. One of the rules of the mind is: Every thought has a physical response in the body. Here’s a simple example of how you can prove this theory: Think of biting into a juicy sour lemon. What’s happening in your mouth?
Another interesting example of proving this rule is: Do the exercise below and feel the difference of reactions in your body. You need a partner to do this exercise.
– Stand in front of each other; lift your right arm straight up at shoulder height. Ask your partner to put two of his/her fingers on your outstretched wrist and to gently push your arm down without force. Now use your energy to resist the pushing down movement and keep your arm steady at shoulder height. Do this to find your natural level of resistance.
– Now think of someone or something that you do not like, take a few second to feel the feeling, now ask your partner to start pushing your arm down; use your energy to resist it. How do you feel? Do you feel it harder to resist the push? You will find that the more you dislike someone, the weaker your resistance will be. It would feel that your body is completely drained of energy.
– Now think of someone or something you love. Take a few second to feel the feeling and use your energy to resist the push. Do you feel a difference in resistance? Do you feel it’s easier to resist the push this time?
– Now do the same exercise as above, but you don’t need to think nor feel the feeling; just say the word “love” repeatedly. How does your resistance feel? Now say the word “hate” repeatedly and resist the pushing-down movement. How is your resistance?
Can you imagine what would happen to our bodies if we let ourselves unconsciously dwell in negative thinking for a long period? Would we still question why our body feels tired and weak or why our immune system is very low, that it has no resistance to germs and viruses?
In my practice as a therapist, I often find this body and mind connection. A lot of the physical ailments that my clients are suffering – whether migraine, back ache, Crohn’s disease, cancer or asthma – are caused by the mind. Our body speaks our mind. Physical discomfort or illness is our body’s way of telling us that there is a negative belief or negative perception that we need to change in us.
It’s interesting that certain emotions create physical discomfort in certain parts of the body. I found that a lot of indigestion or stomach ulcers are caused by unexpressed, built-up anger. Some of us may argue that we don’t have any problem expressing our anger, but we still have stomach indigestion. During a therapy session we usually find that even though we are able to express our anger, we often find that by aggressively shouting or screaming at the person we are angry with, we do not really achieve a proper release of our anger.
It happens because when we aggressively scream or accuse someone of making us angry, some just ignore us by walking away and whatever messages we are trying to say just fall onto deaf ears – or if they stay, in self-defense they automatically erect an invisible wall in front of us and whatever messages we are trying to say will also not get across properly but just bounce back at us instead. When it happens, it makes us feel angrier.
Here are a few examples of recurring symptoms I come across with clients (names have been changed due to client confidentiality):
Back aches. In a lot of cases I find that psychologically, it’s caused by the unconscious feeling of us needing support from others. By healing the inner child that needs the support, we can overcome the ailment.
Joe had to retire early from his career in the police force because of his bad back. He injured his back during a scuffle with a robber. After it happened, he straight away went to see his father, who was a physician, to have it examined. When his father offhandedly dismissed him and told him that there was nothing clinically wrong with his back, he perceived that his father didn’t care about him and felt emotionally hurt. Since then his back pain stayed with him as a sign of his unconscious desire of showing his father that he needed his father to love and care about him. Understanding and letting go this emotional pain, healing took place and his back pain was completely gone.
Knee-joints pain can be caused by our unconscious feeling of not wanting to give in or surrender to some form of authority.
Carlo came to see me for his chronic knee-joint pain. We found that it was caused by his anger towards his manager at the previous company he used to work. He felt his manager, John, was a “dictator.” He felt angry with him but couldn’t do anything about it. Even though he quit his job, his unexpressed anger and silent refusal to surrender caused problems to his knee joints ever since. Understanding his excessive Ego pride and letting go of his anger, Carlo healed his knee-joints pain.
Breath is life. Breathing problems are often caused by our perception that “life is hard.” When we let go of this negative perception, we often find that healing takes place.
Darla had chronic sinusitis since she was young. During a session we found that it was caused by her perception that “life is hard.” She had the tendency of measuring her self-worth by her performances. Her perception was that she had to be the best student at school, which made her study harder than any other student. She felt she had to be the best mother to her children, which made her demand more from them and she could not relax and enjoy her time with them. She also felt that she had to be the best wife to her husband, which made her feel constantly dissatisfied when he didn’t show appreciation of her efforts. She felt that her life was so burdened and heavy with responsibility that she couldn’t relax and enjoy herself. Upon understanding and releasing her needs to be perfect, she accepted herself the way she was and healing took place.
Most headaches or migraines are caused by muscle tension in the head. The tension can be caused by excessive worries or anger and frustrations. When we let go of our worries or anger that cause these tensions, healing takes place.
Mark had been suffering from chronic headaches for six years. During a session, we found two root causes for it. One was his anger and frustration towards his supervisor at the hotel he was working at as a guard. He felt that his supervisor always picked on him and treated him like the black sheep among his colleagues. The second root cause was his perception that his wife did not understand him and demanded too much of him. Releasing his anger and understanding the others point of view, complete healing was achieved.
Healing is achieved when:
We let go of our negative perceptions that we have been holding on to.
We let go of the Ego’s fear and needs of protection to the Spirit or to the greater power of the Universe or God.
We let go of judgments of others and accept that everyone is doing their best in the way they know how.
We let go of judgments of ourselves and accept ourselves, just the way we are.
Spiritually, this is the way for us to achieve wholeness.
Till next week, love and light.
Lydia Wilson is a transpersonal hypnotherapist and trainer based in Kerobokan, Bali. If you have a question you would like answered in this column, write to Lydia at firstname.lastname@example.org. For more go to www.bluelight7.com.Filed under: Discovery